I am deeply indebted to my friend, Jeff Jenkins, for an article by Albert Mohler, which in turn is based on an August 22, 2010 article in the New York Times magazine. In the article, writer Robin Marantz Henig deals with the phenomenon of young people not growing up, not accepting responsibility and acting as adults. Henig points out how, in 1960, the vast majority of young adults had, by the time they reached 30, accomplished the five standard milestones used to measure adult status. In 2000, less than 1/2 of young women had reached these milestones, and more disturbing, less than 1/3 of young men.
As the Times article points out, it’s hard to know how much of this is due to young people not wanting to grow up, and their parents not wanting to let them go. As Henig points out, “It is not just that they are AWOL from adulthood and its responsibilities. They are also missing the joys, consolations, challenges, and responsibilities that make for maturity and long-term flourishing. They will pay a steep price for this delay, and we will pay it with them.”
Mohler, President of a denominational seminary, makes a valid point about the effects this has in religion. “There are deep spiritual concerns here as well. The extension of adolescence (itself a dubious and problematic life stage) means further delay in accepting the kinds of roles and responsibilities that make for mature Christians. And the dangers are clear. As this report highlights, the extension of adolescence into the 20’s was culturally facilitated by the acceptance of premarital sex.”
As I read all this, I wonder how much of this plays in to young adults in the Lord’s church that don’t want to grow up, that still want to live as if they were adolescents. Is the desire to still be childish, to “play” as if still in the world, behind the spiritual problems we find? Why attend worship when there are other activities that are “more fun?” Why give financially when there are so many “big kid” toys to buy? Why be involved in the work of the church when there are so many worldly activities to enjoy? How much of this mentality is, perhaps unconsciously, influencing Christians to stay immature, to feel that God’s grace will cover such an outlook spiritually, and to miss out on the joy of maturing in Christ?
The joys of maturing in Christ? Yes, joy. By refusing to assume responsibility in Christian living, people miss out on how fantastic it is to become more like Christ. How amazing it is to see God at work in your life, molding you in Him, allowing His will to work in you, to love sin less and Jesus more, to have a clearer vision of eternity and what we must do to reach that goal.
Isn’t this what being a child of God is about? This is how Paul can say, “Rejoice in the Lord always; again I say, rejoice” (Phil. 4:4). The article speaks of how premarital sex has figured into this problem. While not everyone has been guilty of such, I can guarantee you Satan is behind this, and sin is a most effective tool in convincing one there’s no harm. He promises so much pleasure from remaining childish, but fails to reveal the heartache, pain, suffering, and ultimate destruction it brings. God is not pleased with Christians who are immature, when they should and could be growing (1 Cor. 3:1-3; Heb. 5:11-14).
Paul reminds us, “When I was a child, I spoke like a child; I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put aside childish things” (1 Cor. 13:11). It’s time for parents, children, and all adults to consider how we may be undermining God’s will for our lives, for today and eternity. Maybe it’s time to say, “Grow up!” It’s definitely time to lovingly yet firmly stress the need for maturity emotionally and spiritually. It’s time for us all to honestly evaluate our lives in Christ, that we don’t miss the greatness of real Christian living today, and heaven tomorrow. “Not that I have already reached the goal, or am already fully mature, but I make every effort to take hold of it because I have also been taken hold of by Christ Jesus” (Phil. 3:12).
Robert
